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So I saw Coldplay in concert last night and they were, in a word, awesome! There was screaming, dancing, blinding strobe lights, and millions and millions of paper butterflies–all the ingredients necessary for a kick-ass concert. But the weirdest part of the night? I came away from the whole experience thinking that Chris Martin is actually attractive. But not only attractive, like. . . a hottie (do the kids still use “hottie”?). Now, you must understand that I’ve always been in the camp of “What is Gwen chris-martinthinking?” but now I realize that Mr Martin is not necessarily the gigantic leap down from Brad Pitt that I once thought he was (still a step down, but who isn’t compared to Brad Pitt?). I mean, lets face it, the guy is SUPER British. I mean REALLY, REALLY British. What with his almost transparent skin, buggy eyes, awkward smile, and gangly extremities, he’s practically your stereotypical 18th century Hobo who wanders around London in rags and the pile of mud he slept on the previous night, getting shooed away by the local Baker. But, this is all an illusion my friend! Some horrific fantasy my mind has played on me for years. . .until last night. On stage, the Hoboness disappears and is replaced by the musical force that is Chris Martin. He’s funny and charming and he plays the guitar (oh, the power of the guitar!). Then again, maybe anyone can look that great on stage, under the correct lighting, surrounded by thousands of screaming fans (and millions of butterflies), playing the guitar. An interesting project in human psychology that should surely be further investigated, but not by me.

Seriously, those blue eyes are staring into the depths of my soul.

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No freakin’ way people!! History was made last night! Not only did Americans elect the first African-American President, but CNN presented its vast election audience with a technology that we have all been waiting years for. No, not the jet pack (unfortunately), but the very form of communication that George Lucas foreshadowed way back in 1977 when he introduced it in a little film you may have heard of called Star Wars. That’s right folks. The Hologram made its way onto the scene last night!! CNN totally pulled an Obi-Wan on us and transmitted a couple of its correspondences right into their NY headquarters. We are entering Sci-Fi territory here people! Technology has caught up to our wildest dreams and I, for one, am blown away.

anderson-cooperWho did CNN decide to bestow with such an honor as to be one of the first to be “beamed” into their studio? Well, none other than the world famous political journalist Will I Am. That’s right. Will. I. Am. Famous mostly for the hit single “Let’s Get Retarded” and for attempting to crawl out from under the shadow cast by former band mate, Plastic-faced Fergie. Whaaaaaa? Granted, he was attending Obama’s speech in Grant Park, so he was in a political setting (which you couldn’t see because that is the point of the Hologram).  But seriously? CNN couldn’t find a more famous black person than Will I Am at the Obama acceptance speech? What about Oprah? She’s OPRAH for goodness sakes!! She and Anderson Cooper are practically BFF! Getting Oprah to be one of the first CNN holograms would have at least ensured that millions of housewives across the nation would be on board with this future technology and have it replace all their telephones as soon as it becomes market ready (Oprah’s favorite things for 2009? Holograms!). But no. Instead, CNN has Andy The Silver Fox Cooper talking to non-BFF Will I AM about an Obama speech he turned into a song. What did this song really do for Obama’s campaign? Nothing quantifiable that I can see. But Oprah snapped her little fingers back in May and instantly had 20,000 people change their minds regarding this election. That, my friends, deserves some beaming action!

(As a side note, I in no way endorse Oprah and actually disagree with mostly everything that comes out of her mouth and think the housewives of America who are on the Oprah bandwagon have decided to drink the Kool Aid and we should give up all hope for them. That being said, her influence is undeniable.)

Here’s the clip. Please watch The Coop’s face in the very beginning. He is either A) totally amazed by this new technology B) wondering who the hell Will I Am is C) thinking “where the heck is my BFF Oprah?” or D) wondering “Why the hell are we playing Star Trek on CNN?”